Anatomy of a photo shoot involving 3 tired, sweaty, and squirmy children
Step 1: Find an interesting location with a serene feel and good lighting. This random pavilion with some kid’s birthday party going on in the back will be perfect.
Step 2: Make sure children are well dressed and that their hair is perfectly coiffed. No, I repeat NO character hair clip paraphernalia allowed. Cupcake printed undershorts optional.
Step 3: Encourage the young ones to BE THEMSELVES! Yes! Halfhearted smiles, disinterested 2 year olds, and expressions that make them seem as if they just got off the short bus are all welcome here!
Step 4: Look at me! Smile! Look at me! Smile! Lookatme lookatme lookatme! … SMILE!
Step 5: SQUIRREL!
Step 6: Ok, you — stay looking over at that squirrel. You — give me that halfhearted smile again like you’re not sure what the hell is going on and you really want to get down but you wouldn’t dare. And YOU — give my some pirate! Garrrrrr! Yes!
Step 7: No, you cannot leave the set. I don’t care if a mosquito flew in your eye. No, I’m sure you don’t have West Nile virus. Hey, You! Pirate chick! Straighten up! More garrrrrr! What? Hell no we’re not done, we’ll be done when I say we’re do– hey, you want I should give you a reason for a real eyepatch there, Pirate?
Step 8: Pirate and mosquito antics done. Sisterly moment! Capture that hug that was in no way suggested, coerced, bribed, or begged for. Concentrate on the love.
Okay. Now, you there. Keep looking at that foot. Good. Nice. Got it.
Step 9: Aaaaand we’re done here. Where’s the margarita pitcher?
Disclaimer: I am not a professional photographer. Like I needed to specify that.
Is summer slowly killing you because you are out of fun ideas? I posted a tutorial over at This Blogger Makes Fun of Stuff for my kids’ all around, hands down, FAVORITE thing to play with, and it’s super cheap and easy to make. Gak! Check it out. You’re welcome.